amazon review of the Velvet Underground & Nico is awesome:
15 of 96 people found the following review helpful:
Why this album sucks so hard.
, August 20, 2004
I bought this album because this smart guy in school is always talking about it and I thought, "Hey, bet he likes cool bands like Incubus and Hoobastank, I should check this out." I mean, "Velvet Underground" sounds like "Velvet Revolver", right? So I was expecting some sweet licks and solos like Slash might pull out, or maybe some awesomely screaming vocals that ROCK the paint off the walls!
Well let me tell you, none of that is to be found.
The album starts off with a little toy xylophone. A TOY XYLOPHONE! Come on! How the hell can your name sound like "Velvet Revolver" and you put little tinkly xylophones in there? It made me want to turn it off immediately, but I pushed through. After some songs, one of them was bluesy and stuff, I get to this song with a viola. I mean, do any of these guys know how to rock? The lead singer just mumbles his way through things, Lou Reed, lead talker! As for the instrumentation, the guitars are sloppy and the drummer is so simplistic, I mean, I bet these guys can't dance AT ALL, and certainly not to the decidedly UN-phat beats on this crap CD.
My other problem is that this CD is just not from the streets. I mean, they claim to be "Underground" but come on, Nico? She's not Beyonce, she's not even Ashanti. Ja Rule wouldn't be caught dead dueting with her, so why the hell is she on this album if it's so great? And Lou Reed would never stand up to 50 Cent. OK, so they hung out with Andy Warhol who survived getting shot, but he got shot by some lady, it's not the same as when a Gangsta shoots you.
In conclusion, this album is decidedly poor. Sloppy instruments, a tired lead singer, and a lack of rockitude force me to recommend New Found Glory or Dave Matthews Band if you want to get down. G-Unit if you want something street. Velvet Underground if you want to waste money.